A day to remember

I'm doing this for my little sister,

Today is her birthday. Happy Birthday!...

Today has been rather boring from an outside veiw, but there has been so much more to it than I can describe. I've learned things today, about myself, my friends, my family and my life.

The other night, I was watching TV and my ex-girlfriend called me. I really didn't feel like talking at the moment, but I could feel the warmth rolling off her tongue and the peace and love pouring from her heart. I let her speak... and as she did she sent drops of light across space and through the reciever of my cell phone... and once they entered my ear they burst into light across my mind. She told me that she was proud of me for being a strong man of God, and proud of how I never give into nonbelief. And that was it. But it really touched me that God would move her so much as to call me and tell me that with such love.

Last night I worked from 3 in the afternoon until 7 this morning. One of the managers had asked me to stay and take some overtime hours to help and push the freight from the trucks. I was going to go home... I was really, really tired... but at some point that night a revelation hit me. At once I knew that I would regret not having stayed to earn that extra money and lend that extra support to my frineds... I knew this regret was going to be far more painful than the toll of extended working and delayed sleep on my body, mind, and soul. So I stayed and proclaimed it to everyone standing there with me.

it turned out to be fun and refreshing. I enjoyed spending time with my friends, sharing in their toil, and tasting bits of their lives. I was stepping beyond the norm and experiencing it as someting new... something even more beautiful.

Today my older sister came into our apartment when I was least expecting it. I was laying on the floor thinking about what I was going to do with the day. I had already slept until 2:30. But there she was as I began to get ready to move to the computer lab. I was glad to have her company. She offered to make eggplant parmesan... so we scraped up the supplies and the ingredients, cooked, and ate. I have never had eggplant, and now I know I wasn't missing much. There is a buttery taste to it that really numbs my tongue. I'm not planing on eating it again. I tried really hard, but had to say my farewells to it in the end.

Thats when we started to talk. She wrote down all of the positives and negatives about staying in our apartment while I go to Japan, and she also wrote them down for her returning to Georgia. To me her negatives for moving to Georgia far outweighed her negatives for staying here. I feel that the hard road, is often the most rewarding. I have been learning that recently...

Speaking of her options really turn my attention to my own. My mind is telling me to stay in Charlotte and to not go to Japan. After all I could just avoid my fears forever and live a normal complacent life. I don't have to go through the Hell of a claustraphobic airplane trip across the world for 18 hours. And then sit through the tides of a forgein environment for a year. I could just sit comfortably at home for the rest of my life. But my heart is telling me NO! It says that I must step beyond my barriers and let nothing hedge me in and hold back the directional growth of my spirit. I don't want anything on this earth to hold the reins to my spiritual happiness.

In part I am growing to rebell against the stiffling stagnancy of a pointless existance. But then again, I really want to learn Japanese. And I want to learn so much more. Knowledge isn't held in just one place... it's scattered across the globe, ingrained in various perspectives, and flowing like an unfailing tide from one generation to the next. God moves through all of creation. He has no favorites, but takes joy in those who find Him and live by His word.

I have so much to do.